It was just two years ago that we lost our first baby. I was 12 weeks pregnant and felt like I could breathe easier knowing that I "made it" through most of the first trimester. I remember feeling relieved that I would not have to experience the heartache of losing a baby like so many of my close friends had. I remember thinking that I could not relate to them in their sorrow. I did not know that I was days away from joining together with them in the grief that only an expectant mother full of expectation for her child's future could know.
I just put a new song on our playlist called "Held." I remember listening to this song and understanding how it felt to be held when something so sacred was torn from us. It was really such a sad time and also a time that brought Demetrius and I together as we learned how to love and lose, how to grieve and how to trust the Creator of Life even when it hurt.
It is truly amazing to see how our family has grown in so many ways (including size) in the past two years. It is an understatement to say that we are so thankful for life and for breath and for a loving marriage and for children and yes, even for sorrow and suffering.
3 comments:
I AM SO HAPPY TO SEE HOW FAR YOU ALL HAVE WENT. WHEN I HEARD I CRIED...BUT KNOW LOOK AT WHAT YOU ALL HAVE NOW A SWEET LITTLE BOY AND ANOTHER ONE ON THE WAY...WE ALL LOVE YOU AND HOPE YOU ALL ARE DOIN GOOD....ILOVE YOU LOVE REBECCA
Oh Amy,
I remember well this loss of ours. You are right in that our God is very good and very purposeful and He loves us. Our suffering has brought Him glory, and although tears will still be shed over the memories and loss of these tiny ones, He has remembered each and every tear that falls. I'm thankful for your friendship and I miss you dearly!
-annie
Good post! He does indeed give and take away, but His name is still blessed! So glad you were able to feel "Held" I love that song!
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